I'm One Of Those Lucky People
What do you do if you have a cold? I've been asked this question hundreds of times.
Well my smug reply is always the same.
'Well you see, I never get colds, I am one of those lucky people who just never catch that nasty virus, thanks goodness because if I did it would put me out of work for up to 2 weeks, I'm very lucky'
I'm also very pompous.
So last week my lovely Peter has a stinking cold. So in his dreams, I'm donning my nurses uniform and tucking him up with Lemsip and his favorite teddy, mopping his fevered brow and generally fretting as to whether this fever will ever break and should I check his life insurance is up to date.
In reality I hold him at arm's length and make him sleep in the spare room, apart from the fact that he keeps me up half the night with his coughing, spluttering and sneezing, there is always a chance that I'll break the habit of a lifetime and actually catch it from him.
So finally, he feels better and I have to shove over and gather up my Woman's Own as he returns to the marital bed.
The next morning I awake to the not so familiar scratchy throat feeling that precedes a cold. So I loudly domestically verbally abuse him and then hope to God that a decent job offer that I can't be put off comes in.
It was even worse than I thought, client from last week comes back with an urgent request for a pick up on a sentence that I MISSED, yes my fault! Oooookaaayyyy.
Email : Oh yep not a problem, I can do that.
Email: Great, can you do it today? As soon as, the animators want to put the narration to the film.
I enter the booth hopefully, clutching sudafed, tissues, water, sinex stuffed up my nose, and start
'Thangs to you, our custobers, we hab had a bery productive year. Thang you for choosig ud for your ......'
'Sorry, just stop you there Angela, Is there something wrong with your studio?'
(all innocence) 'Do'
'Oh. Do you have a bit of a cold?'
'A wee bid'
'Ok.... it's quite obvious'
'Shall we leave this until next week?'
'Bud wad aboud the animadors?! They be bad with be!'
'It's not you fault.'
'It id my fauld!'
'You can't help a cold'
I left the sendance oud
'No you didn't they didn't add it in!'
'Ohhhhh......in dat case, I can'd help a cold. Tell theb, I'll be chargig exdra for de stress!'
So the answer to the question 'what do you do if you have a cold?' is blame my husband, try to get away with it, then make out it's everyone else's fault.